September Melancholy

Leaves at Delapre Abbey - by R Neil Marshman (c)

September is the month in which the fall begins, the month in which the world is immersed in different colors. The leaves of the trees are yellow, red or brown. It is as if the forests celebrate once again the life until the leaves die and fall to the ground. Life is screaming from everywhere. The trees are allying themselves to one last rear up against the cold, the snow and the quietness of the winter.

September is also the month in which I was born. Each year in this month begins for me the time of reflection and melancholy. Is it the birthday that leads me to sink so deeply into me, or is it the nature that makes me to think of the end of life? I do not know.

But here I am. Celebrating the beginning of my life while around me, nature and trees celebrating the end of their leaves as the wind carries them away.

And I invariably ask me about my life. What have I achieved? Where do I work? What did I do in the last year? What did I plan? Where did I go? Am I there, where I wanted to be and where I should be? What should I change, around me, in my life, at me? Is my life now, how it should be? How do I want it at all? Am I really satisfied? Really happy?

These questions gnaw at me every year. Every time the melancholy and questions reach me again. No matter how satisfied and happy I am in my life, this month of the year I look back and forward again. Embracing the September melancholy.

yours, Aylena

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Only those who know the past have a future!
- Wilhelm von Humboldt
 

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The further we can look into the past, the further we can see in the future.
- Winston Churchill